Overwhelmed or underwhelmed

It can be hard to be constantly, permanently and eternally fascinated by your project work. I go through phases of loving it and not really being overly pushed about it. Sometimes there are far more interesting things to be doing/reading/considering. While I’ve always had an interest in sci comms and policy, reading about it and commenting is taking precedence over my work of late.

The sheer volume of work I need to complete over the next few years is pretty overwhelming when I think about it, especially when I consider how much (or how little) I have done to date. I came back from recent conferences invigorated and excited about science and what I can achieve, but that wears off. I enjoy reading about my field, I like designing experiments, and teaching people around me, but actually executing my own experiments with my hands is harder than it should be. Not due to the arthritis, but a lack of will.

At the moment, I spend a lot of time ordering supplies for the lab and doing various housekeeping chores like preparing for health & safety inspections and clearing out the remains of PhD’s who have long left the lab (seriously, how can people not archive the relevant work and discard what doesn’t need to be kept). This work keeps me occupied and useful, without necessarily progressing my PhD work. In a larger lab, these duties might be spread across more people, but in our tiny lab it’s primarily my responsibility.

So for now, things are tipping away, but I should probably see if Santa Claus will bring me focus and motivation next month…

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